Post by chrischris on Sept 18, 2011 15:00:14 GMT -5
"Ants Marching" by Dave Matthews Band is playing as we see Chris Chris' logo appear on the screen. The music fades out as the shot switches over to show Chris Chris, decked out in a white CJ Wilson Texas Rangers baseball jersey, jeans, blue shades and blue Texas Rangers headband, standing out at the patio of a local Sonic Drive In. Looks to be the Bedford location that's just down the road from LD Bell High School.
What's up P1s. Despite the rumors that have been going around, mostly perpetrated by that fountain of misinformation, Neptune, I am not feeling under the weather. I am 100% ready to go. The Uniform Czar, however... not so much. Apparently, he is so distraught with how today's youth loves the godawful uniforms that have taken over college football that it makes him sick, literally. But enough about that.
Now I know you're all wondering how I feel about what happened last week at Fall Brawl. I feel cheated, brah! Hell, the whole match caught me off guard because I thought the match would be taking place later. When I found out it was going on right when I arrived at the building, I didn't even have time to get dressed into my ring attire, so I just ran in there with my T-shirt and jeans. And when I got to the ring, that Denise du Pris bitch totally caught me off guard. She grabbed at my belt in hopes that I would be thinking with something other than my brain. Well I have to give her credit. The bitch outsmarted me. But hey, I can't help it if I'm so used to all the chicks digging these abs that I naturally thought that Denise wanted me.
But enough about that fluke of a battle royal. I have bigger things to worry about such as my tag team match with Nate Bishop this coming Monday night. Nate seems like good peeps, unlike that idiot that hangs around him, giving him more misinformation. I'm surprised he's not hanging out with Neptune. One guy would lie, and the other would swear to it, man. It's obvious that Neptune isn't ready for this match. I mean, just look at everything he's dealing with. First he's stupid enough to take a bet that he would become Klayton Gunn's bitch if he lost, and the idiot lost. As if that's not enough, he runs down this upcoming tag team match as worthless. Well gee, knucklehead, I guess the fans should just tune the match out then, shouldn't they? I mean after all, this is a worthless tag team match. You know how stupid that sounds, man? If you call this match worthless, then why should anybody watch it?! Then the next opportunity you have to address the match, you want to film some stupid reality show instead of trying to convince everyone why you'll win? You gotta be kidding me, dude! I won't even get into the whole deal with the bank. That stupidity writes itself.
And the funniest thing? We've yet to hear from Santiago, your tag team partner. It's pretty sad if even he has figured out that you're hopeless. I don't blame him for not wanting to show up if that is indeed the case. One more thing...
All of a sudden, the manager on duty of the Sonic comes marching out, none too pleased with Chris Chris. While she's quite good looking with her long, black hair, her beauty might as well be hidden by the look of anger on her face.
Chris! You're supposed to have clocked in twenty minutes ago! The cooks are slammed back there and really need help getting the onion rings ready! Hell, you're not even dressed! What the hell?!
A look of panic washes over Chris Chris as he's been exposed yet again. It's apparent that he was fired from his previous job at Chili's and found his way to Sonic. Wonder how long he'll last here.
Oh my god, everybody knows I'm a line cook at Sonic!
Chris Chris runs off to his car, hops in and speeds out as the shot fades to black.
What's up P1s. Despite the rumors that have been going around, mostly perpetrated by that fountain of misinformation, Neptune, I am not feeling under the weather. I am 100% ready to go. The Uniform Czar, however... not so much. Apparently, he is so distraught with how today's youth loves the godawful uniforms that have taken over college football that it makes him sick, literally. But enough about that.
Now I know you're all wondering how I feel about what happened last week at Fall Brawl. I feel cheated, brah! Hell, the whole match caught me off guard because I thought the match would be taking place later. When I found out it was going on right when I arrived at the building, I didn't even have time to get dressed into my ring attire, so I just ran in there with my T-shirt and jeans. And when I got to the ring, that Denise du Pris bitch totally caught me off guard. She grabbed at my belt in hopes that I would be thinking with something other than my brain. Well I have to give her credit. The bitch outsmarted me. But hey, I can't help it if I'm so used to all the chicks digging these abs that I naturally thought that Denise wanted me.
But enough about that fluke of a battle royal. I have bigger things to worry about such as my tag team match with Nate Bishop this coming Monday night. Nate seems like good peeps, unlike that idiot that hangs around him, giving him more misinformation. I'm surprised he's not hanging out with Neptune. One guy would lie, and the other would swear to it, man. It's obvious that Neptune isn't ready for this match. I mean, just look at everything he's dealing with. First he's stupid enough to take a bet that he would become Klayton Gunn's bitch if he lost, and the idiot lost. As if that's not enough, he runs down this upcoming tag team match as worthless. Well gee, knucklehead, I guess the fans should just tune the match out then, shouldn't they? I mean after all, this is a worthless tag team match. You know how stupid that sounds, man? If you call this match worthless, then why should anybody watch it?! Then the next opportunity you have to address the match, you want to film some stupid reality show instead of trying to convince everyone why you'll win? You gotta be kidding me, dude! I won't even get into the whole deal with the bank. That stupidity writes itself.
And the funniest thing? We've yet to hear from Santiago, your tag team partner. It's pretty sad if even he has figured out that you're hopeless. I don't blame him for not wanting to show up if that is indeed the case. One more thing...
All of a sudden, the manager on duty of the Sonic comes marching out, none too pleased with Chris Chris. While she's quite good looking with her long, black hair, her beauty might as well be hidden by the look of anger on her face.
Chris! You're supposed to have clocked in twenty minutes ago! The cooks are slammed back there and really need help getting the onion rings ready! Hell, you're not even dressed! What the hell?!
A look of panic washes over Chris Chris as he's been exposed yet again. It's apparent that he was fired from his previous job at Chili's and found his way to Sonic. Wonder how long he'll last here.
Oh my god, everybody knows I'm a line cook at Sonic!
Chris Chris runs off to his car, hops in and speeds out as the shot fades to black.