Post by Logan on Apr 10, 2012 15:49:50 GMT -5
The scene opens up to a trailer park in Mesa, Arizona. One of these trailers belongs to Logan. It’s not classy, certainly not a status symbol, and some may even wonder why a household name like Captain Treachery would be living in a trailer. He’s not past his days yet, he still earns decent money working his trade. So why a trailer? And why a trashy one? These and other questions will soon become answered, because Logan stepped into the cameras shot, a big grin to go along with his handsome face.
LOGAN: Do you see this lovely house behind me?
He’s referring to the double wide with a tarp covered roof.
LOGAN: I bought this for my girlfriend six years ago. She thinks my income isn’t the best, that’s because I lied to her. That’s what I do. I lie a lot; nothing is more boring than the truth. What she doesn’t know however is that I know Rick Mad, and wouldn’t you know.. so does she.
His grin fades.
LOGAN: This is where things become amusing, well, for me at least. My surprise appearance last week isn’t as random as you may think it is, Rick. It’s a real fortunate coincidence that you never introduced me to your wife all these years, for if you had I probably wouldn’t be standing in a trailer park in front of a camera in front of the UWA’s most loyal viewers. Can you start to visualize where this may be going? No? Oh, honnnney…
The trailer door opens and DANITA MAD’s head sticks out from the doors opening.
DANITA MAD: Yes?
LOGAN: My belly has an aching for a mustard hotdog.
She nods, disappearing back into the house to prepare lunch.
LOGAN: How in the world did this happen, Rick Mad, how has this slipped under your nose? She didn’t divorce you because you spent too much time on the road, and it wasn’t because fans dubbed her terrible names. No, you two divorced because, well, she moved onto bigger and better things. Yet here she is in a trailer. But moving on, she being the kind hearted woman she is, she thought it’d be better NOT to tell you the truth. After all, you are a very sensitive man aren’t you, her leaving you for ANOTHER wrestler would’ve sent little broken hearted Ricky to the nearest liquor store preceding a stay in jail or an asylum. So, she kept things quiet. I kept things quiet. I spent all the money she gained from your divorce, she thinks I lost it gambling, because well you see.. she thinks I have a gambling problem!
The treacherous grin returns.
LOGAN: She even believes that through love and faith that she cured me of a gambling problem, one that never existed to begin with. We have a very close trust and bond with one another, something she tells me that her ex-husband and she never had. So, I tucked her away in this lovely little park and we’ve been living happily ever since. I go out onto the road and wrestle dark matches for low income, when in reality I’m living in a four story house in Virginia waiting for my next twenty thousand dollar WCF match to begin. How could she not find out about this? That’s real simple; real simple. You see, Rick Mad, your wife is a gawd damn hermit. We can’t afford cable much less a phone and she hasn’t been out of the house in five years. Matter of fact, I even had to arrange for a kid down the street to deliver her supplies from time to time. Perhaps she is depressed; maybe she thinks that deep down she should have never left ole Rick Mad. BUT the real question is.. why now?
He gets intimate with the camera, his face digging closer into it.
LOGAN: I got your sad drunken desperate letter a few weeks ago, her old address of mail forwards here. She hasn’t read the letter, never did. I knew that if she did, well, I might lose my little trailer whore. So, I responded, and it was fun.. I barely made it through the letter without soaking it with tears of joy. I wrote it as if I was Danita, hoping you may find some closure with it and stop bothering us love birds. But no.. I knew you wouldn’t. I knew it’d only be a matter of time before you wrote another and then eventually little Danita would wonder outside one day, check the mail, and see that her precious Rick Mad still had a warm spot and desperately needed her. That might just break her out of hermit hood, then she’d find out about me, and I can’t have you ruining the fun! So, I returned to this little joke of a federation to shut you up. And I’m not going to leave until you do in fact.. SHUT UP! It’s probably going to take more than a falls count anywhere match; surely you’re too stubborn to go down for one match. No Rick. It may be every single week. If I have to personally talk to Ryan Blake every week and make sure you and I are booked then that’s what I’ll do. Over and over again until you can understand that Danita doesn’t love you no more, hell, she never did.
He pushes the camera away from his face and the screen goes black.
LOGAN: Do you see this lovely house behind me?
He’s referring to the double wide with a tarp covered roof.
LOGAN: I bought this for my girlfriend six years ago. She thinks my income isn’t the best, that’s because I lied to her. That’s what I do. I lie a lot; nothing is more boring than the truth. What she doesn’t know however is that I know Rick Mad, and wouldn’t you know.. so does she.
His grin fades.
LOGAN: This is where things become amusing, well, for me at least. My surprise appearance last week isn’t as random as you may think it is, Rick. It’s a real fortunate coincidence that you never introduced me to your wife all these years, for if you had I probably wouldn’t be standing in a trailer park in front of a camera in front of the UWA’s most loyal viewers. Can you start to visualize where this may be going? No? Oh, honnnney…
The trailer door opens and DANITA MAD’s head sticks out from the doors opening.
DANITA MAD: Yes?
LOGAN: My belly has an aching for a mustard hotdog.
She nods, disappearing back into the house to prepare lunch.
LOGAN: How in the world did this happen, Rick Mad, how has this slipped under your nose? She didn’t divorce you because you spent too much time on the road, and it wasn’t because fans dubbed her terrible names. No, you two divorced because, well, she moved onto bigger and better things. Yet here she is in a trailer. But moving on, she being the kind hearted woman she is, she thought it’d be better NOT to tell you the truth. After all, you are a very sensitive man aren’t you, her leaving you for ANOTHER wrestler would’ve sent little broken hearted Ricky to the nearest liquor store preceding a stay in jail or an asylum. So, she kept things quiet. I kept things quiet. I spent all the money she gained from your divorce, she thinks I lost it gambling, because well you see.. she thinks I have a gambling problem!
The treacherous grin returns.
LOGAN: She even believes that through love and faith that she cured me of a gambling problem, one that never existed to begin with. We have a very close trust and bond with one another, something she tells me that her ex-husband and she never had. So, I tucked her away in this lovely little park and we’ve been living happily ever since. I go out onto the road and wrestle dark matches for low income, when in reality I’m living in a four story house in Virginia waiting for my next twenty thousand dollar WCF match to begin. How could she not find out about this? That’s real simple; real simple. You see, Rick Mad, your wife is a gawd damn hermit. We can’t afford cable much less a phone and she hasn’t been out of the house in five years. Matter of fact, I even had to arrange for a kid down the street to deliver her supplies from time to time. Perhaps she is depressed; maybe she thinks that deep down she should have never left ole Rick Mad. BUT the real question is.. why now?
He gets intimate with the camera, his face digging closer into it.
LOGAN: I got your sad drunken desperate letter a few weeks ago, her old address of mail forwards here. She hasn’t read the letter, never did. I knew that if she did, well, I might lose my little trailer whore. So, I responded, and it was fun.. I barely made it through the letter without soaking it with tears of joy. I wrote it as if I was Danita, hoping you may find some closure with it and stop bothering us love birds. But no.. I knew you wouldn’t. I knew it’d only be a matter of time before you wrote another and then eventually little Danita would wonder outside one day, check the mail, and see that her precious Rick Mad still had a warm spot and desperately needed her. That might just break her out of hermit hood, then she’d find out about me, and I can’t have you ruining the fun! So, I returned to this little joke of a federation to shut you up. And I’m not going to leave until you do in fact.. SHUT UP! It’s probably going to take more than a falls count anywhere match; surely you’re too stubborn to go down for one match. No Rick. It may be every single week. If I have to personally talk to Ryan Blake every week and make sure you and I are booked then that’s what I’ll do. Over and over again until you can understand that Danita doesn’t love you no more, hell, she never did.
He pushes the camera away from his face and the screen goes black.